Don't really have much to update about or feel like updating for that matter. This one might be pretty short and uneventful but there is something I need to get off my chest. So. . .just warning you. Yesterday we went to Benihana, finally, even though my birthday is long past but I still had the $30 gift certificate so I wanted to get my ocean treasure dinner that I always get. Well, actually, I wanted Poke but I don't think they have that there. They totally should have a poke bar though cause yeah, that'd be cool but it was mandatory that I order dinner to use that certificate so whatever. Anyway, I was starving AF but I still hate that I had to be missing my shows. Wednesdays I watch a lot of shit, remember? I was recording it but still. There was this cute guy there who I thought was going to be our waiter and he was at the beginning, but then who fucking knows, he went off to be someone else's waiter. He looked like the kind of guy that'd be on a romance novel cover. I'm not a big fan of facial hair though and he had some along his whole jaw, a short beard but yeah. My mom said he looked like Daniel from the side. Pffft! I don't think so! If he did, I would've noticed first, believe me, and I probably would've creamed my panties. It's so damn loud in Benihana, like all the time. Sometimes I can't even hear myself think. Fortunately, there was only one other group sitting at our table so there were two empty chairs left. Christian took the one closest to me and then Hyde and Damon were all trying to decide who would take the other. Back and forth, they were like: "You take it" - "no, you take it." I was all like:
And. . .
Christian got so irritated, he was finally like: "Well one of you take it. My God." I know he gets irritated and impatient with them easily but I found it cute. They've done that before when I've been in the ER and there's a chair open for them. They go back and forth, wanting the other one to take it. It's really something to see, considering they're always fighting over me or having a turn at something. Christian, like my mom, was getting irritable with me for being on my phone instead of actually enjoying and watching the show the Chef was putting on. He was like: "Sweetheart, put that away, eat." If I were at his table, I know what his rule would be: "No electronics at the dinner table. Ever." That's one of his Dominant rules. Trust me, if he could, he would take my phone away A LOT and I wouldn't get it back until after we're alone again. I'd probably get spanked a lot more if he was able to take it away from me. I'd complain and be all bad-tempered about him having it in his suit and wanting to get it back anyway I could. I was watching the Chef show though. It was the other dumbass group at the table that wasn't. So rude. He didn't even get to show off like all the others do. I felt stupid when they assumed it was my birthday and told me "Happy Birthday," the waitresses. I'm like: "Uh, that was a long time ago." I'm not a Libra or an October birthday, but you guys know that already. While I was starting to feel a little sick after I had my meal, it wasn't like straight-to-the bathroom sick like I usually expect so, that was a relief. I told the waitress I didn't want ice cream even though they bring it to you with your birthday meal and it was so cute, she brought me a little cup with just whipped cream and chocolate syrup, with a candle stuck in it. Yummy! So I wasn't about to turn that down, but at least I got to make the wish I didn't get to make on my birthday so yeah. That was nice but that hot guy never came back like I wanted him to. My mom said that maybe I was making him uncomfortable. Pfft! What? Just cause I tried to take a picture of him to share to my Instagram? But one thing I didn't hate was when he bent over the other table beside ours and gave me an unobstructed view of his fine ass. As soon as I saw that, there was only one thought in my mind. . .
I seriously wish I'd had a dollar on me cause yeah. . .I was ready to shove it down his pants. Thank you for that, by the way. Whoever he was. I wouldn't be surprised if my male spirits or entities got jealous. Probably. They always do when they see me hot for another guy. He wasn't THAT hot. Maybe without the beard. Still, I woulda thrown a dollar at dat ass.
After Benihana, we headed to Stater Bros and Walmart for groceries since I had my food stamps come. There was like a four-car accident on the freeway that my mom swears she saw a car flipped over, but I didn't see any flipped car. She was like: "I'm not looking, I'm not looking. If we had left five minutes earlier, that could've been us." I had to roll my eyes and I told her, yeah, "that'd be bad. . .for you, but I have a death wish." As much as I hate gory shit and have a weak stomach, there's still the super curious macabre part of my mind that always wants to look but I resisted and didn't look either. I had to remind myself that if I wanted to look at that kind of shit, I would've just went to the fucking Death Museum. I hear they have shitloads of car accident pictures and gore. Ugh! Just ugh! I can't believe there's actually a website devoted to "gore" and nothing but "gore." People are fucking sick! And then my mom told me this story about her friend who got killed in a car accident a couple of months ago by some random fuking guy who was trying to kill himself and his wife and kids. That's really fucked up. . .so her friend had to be the one to die because some fuck decided to be a homicidal asshole at the intersection?
So we went to Stater Bros and then the Walmart market and Christian, of course, was not pleased that I didn't bring a jacket so he did the chivalrous thing he always does, takes off his coat and drapes it over my shoulders. Like I'm Hayley! He's so sweet. He's been super conscious lately of me getting cold and then proceeds to make sure that I'm staying warm by covering me in some way. There was another hot guy/cutie at Walmart. He was much less muscular and much younger but walking around in a suit and tie. I was like: "Every girl's crazy for a sharp dressed man." I, unfortunately, didn't get to have my usual sex romp with Carlon last night or even get 45 minutes of meditation in because my stomach was feeling really sick. Sorry sexy, but I think he understood. When I started to feel him thrust, I just laid down the law and he stopped. I'm feeling better today. On another random note, Christian is so happy to see that I don't have trouble walking anymore. That I can remain on my feet and get up out of bed so easily. He couldn't be anymore pleased. Ditto, Daddy, ditto. He made me feel like a toddler the other day when he was like: "You're walking so well." Lol! Well yeah, that's what legs are for. I'm not 3. XD I didn't say that to him of course, because I would've gotten a spanking but you know. . .
Oh! I almost forgot to mention these dreams I keep having of my mom dying. I feel like they're a wake-up call from God or something, but they hurt my heart and when I wake up from them, I immediately want to tell her I love her and hug her. Unfortunately, when I woke up from this one today, she had already left for work so I couldn't hug her. In the dream, she was really sick like with a terminal illness. There was another part of the dream where I was also in this building and she was outside in a rainstorm and then she fell and must've hit her head. God, I can't deal with these dreams anymore. They make me feel like I'm the worst person ever for not taking the time to appreciate her being around. I'm seriously going to have to stop wishing bad things upon her or mentioning death. I think I'm starting to come down to earth. Whatever that means. One time I woke up from a dream and told her I loved her because the dream was so scary of her dying and I kid you not, she got paranoid as fuck thinking I was telling her goodbye and going to commit suicide. She was texting me like crazy and then straight up came home early from work because she was worried I had done something, all teary and everything. God! First of all, I don't have the courage to kill myself. . .yet (I'm working up to that) and second of all, if I was going to kill myself, I wouldn't text something short and simple like that. I'd write a letter, on paper, a goodbye letter and it would be much longer.
Comments