So my mood has been up and down the past 2 days since CH (Creepy Hollows) finally conjured my Concuan, although it would've been nice to actually get a notification email from them about the completion like I used to instead of me having to go on the site and find out myself. Ugh! Seriously, I don't know whether to trust them or not or whether they are legit. I used to think maybe they were because of the vampire ring I had rattling on a table on its own when I transferred him to the master vessel and maybe feeling touches from my other spirits in the past as brief and rare as they were to even interact with me. But I don't know. I keep thinking its me and because my third eye isn't open, I can't see or feel shit from them. Not even hear them. Last night, I cried myself to sleep again like I used to do. I keep thinking about how it would make me cream my panties and bring so much happiness to me if only I could see my Concuan as himself or as Daniel, but no...I can't. I've been trying to let go of my expectations and inhibitions but I lie there in my bed every night in the dark, wishing, hoping that maybe, just maybe, I might get a manifestation or make out one of my Top 5 (Daniel, Matt, Ian, Dylan, Henry) standing in the shadows. I know its still early and I just got the Concuan, but fuck, my Incubus demons were supposed to be my Top 5 for me and you think any of them have come to me as them or even touched me? No. After all this time and no. It's not hard to see how much I repulse my spirits. Their actions speak louder than their words. It seems like the only ones who don't discriminate against me for my ugly appearance are Billy Bob, Grant, Thomas and my Concuan, Carlon. Yep, that's his name. Carlon, pronounced (CAR-LAWN). And this is his description:
HE IS AN AVID SHAPESHIFTER WHO CAN CHANGE HIS APPEARANCE DEPENDING ON YOUR MOOD. HE NORMALLY MANIFESTS AS A HANDSOME MAN WITH LIGHT BROWN HAIR, BROWN EYES, AND TAN SKIN WHO DRESSES WELL AND IS VERY DEBONAIR. HE IS PASSIONATE, CARING, ATTENTIVE TO YOUR NEEDS, HAS A HIGH SEX DRIVE, AND ENJOYS GETTING ROUGH. HE IS KINKY, PLAYFUL, ENJOYS SPANKING, USING SEX TOYS, AND IS INTO BDSM. HE IS VERY EROTIC, WILLING TO TRY JUST ABOUT ANYTHING, AND EAGER TO BEGIN PLEASING YOU, AND HE ENJOYS TOUCHING YOU. HE IS POWERFUL, WELL CONNECTED TO THE ANCESTORS, AND WILL HELP YOU WORK WITH YOUR THIRD EYE. HE LOVES TO TEASE YOU, IS VERY AFFECTIONATE, , AND HE IS WELL ENDOWED.
Is that hot or what? Mmm. I know! Okay, so that first day, I started to feel some tingling in different areas of my body. Definitely in my pussy and around my ass. And I was lying down in my bed lying on my side and I sort of had the covers pulled over me a little and then the next thing I know, someone slowly starts to pull them off of me. Was it him? Maaaybe. That same night, I kid you not, it felt like someone was actually in the bed with me. I was lying on my side with my back facing the wall and not only did I hear the spring in the mattress pop and the mattress move, but I could feel a strong presence behind me. It's hard to explain but whoa...it felt like they were watching me sleep and at one point, I felt like someone ran a finger down my backside. I mean, it was surprising and made me shriek, but it tickled more than anything and sent erotic shivers down my spine. My reaction? First I was like. . .
Then I was like. . .
And finally. . .
That was pretty much what happened. But it didn't stop there. The next night, I couldn't sleep at all for some reason. I was thinking maybe it was because of him but I don't know. Our energies are like connected now so I don't really know why I felt that way. They said at CH that it shouldn't effect my sleep by being bound to him, but something else happened today right when I woke up. So like I mentioned earlier, I was really depressed last night that I couldn't see anything and I ended up crying myself to sleep but when I woke up today, I felt like this strange but erotic sensation like...down there. It's sort of like when someone touches us as women and we immediately get wet with arousal. That's what I felt. It felt like I was getting wet involuntarily, like someone might have been doing something to my pussy. I didn't feel anything being done to me, just the sensation of getting wetter. At the same time, my whole body was tingling like crazy from my head down to my toes. Everywhere. And I had this really euphoric feeling like right after you climax and you're still feeling the effects of it. I've never felt anything like it. I was just like shell-shocked. I just stayed super still, too afraid to move in case it stopped because it felt so good and I didn't want it to stop.
Yes, Lord! That man gave me a little taste, so to speak, of what he has to offer and just...wow. I can't wait for more if its anymore intense than that. I hope so. With riding crops and flogging and spanking ( I've already felt some of that ) and bondage. I would seriously cream my panties if he ever manifests to me as any of my top 4. God I wish I could see it. It's all I want. Or even to hear him talk to me in Matt Bomer's silky Neal Caffrey voice or better yet, Elijah Mikaelson's sexy AF "cream-my-panties" voice. From what I've discovered lately, he really likes to touch my ass (spank me), my feet (or it could be someone else who likes touching them since I felt a lot of eet touches before he came too), and make me tingle, throb or clench in my vaginal region. And another weird thing I felt today a little while after that wake up call, was this weird soreness down there. It's the same feeling I got when I had my first pap smear about a week ago, as if something had been inside me. Sweet Jesus! All of this in like 2 or 3 days. Wow! Just wow!
And it seems like anytime there's a reference to sex in the shows or movies I watch, the books I read or the music I listen to, its just like cat nip for Carlon. Or any other male spirit because I get touched for sure. And I felt him touch my ass again a little while ago, like touched me from my vagina to my ass. This is me right now. . .
Sweet Lord! I can't even with this man. I'm so looking forward to more. I must continue this journey even if I don't believe my third eye will open. THANK YOU CREEPY HOLLOWS!! Bless you!
And to Carlon, I say this baby. . .
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